Just a few thoughts. My wife is on her well-deserved sabbatical this year, and she recently returned from a 10-day visit to the East Coast. She says 9-day, but Sunday through Sunday is actually eight, plus Monday and most of Tuesday = 10, right? ...Right. Anyway, the boys and I had to make do without her.
I joked about being a 'single parent,' but there were plenty of differences. She left us with provisions, and it was a short enough trip that many of the things she normally does could wait for her return. (That doesn't mean I didn't shop, cook, and do some laundry, folks.) More important: there was an end in sight, and, in the meantime, I was still able to touch bases with Pauline; I still had my life-partner within "speaking distance."
Occasionally, I said, "I don't know how single parents can do this full time." On the other hand, about half-way through we had a rhythm to our days, even with commuting, and needing to meet Mac's bus, and several evening meetings back at the church, and full-day-agendas. Because we could afford it, the extra childcare for 4-year-old Trevan was certainly handy. And, believe me, I wouldn't trade those ten days with my boys for anything! The one-on-one time that I had with each, bowling, movies, story and TV-time was all fun and memorable.
With help, with the benefit of a full-time income, solo-parenting is "do-able"... but challenging and tiring. I was grateful and relieved that it was only 10 days. Because, in that limited time--even with work, affordable daycare, and all my church friends and peers--I could sense how very isolating single-parenting can be. ...and if I had been looking for a job, or couldn't afford adequate day-care? Holy-moly. Getting on top of that can't happen without a lot of outside help.
There are many long-term single parents around us. There are also people who are--effectively--single-parenting. Sometimes we look at them from our limited perspectives, and we're sure they are doing it all wrong. But there are huge differences between what we see and assume about other people's lives, abilities & resources, and our lives.
Say a little prayer, and then offer an extra hand. It makes a difference!
